Looks like I totally went on hiatus without noticing. So hello, blog. I’m officially in college now and officially busy enough not to post on you often. BUT. I promise to post at least once a week. I swear. Cross my heart and hope to die.

I have nothing to write about right now so I’ll come back to you later.


Recently I’ve decided to change things up a bit. I’ve already started with my blog (moved from Blogspot to WordPress), my fitness (although right now, I can’t actually do any athletic activities due to having my fourth wisdom tooth removed) and my sense of responsibility (not that I was never responsible…)

So what if it’s not a new year? So what if it’s not spring (there isn’t a spring in the Philippines anyway)? I think it would have been a bit more reasonable for me to do what I’m about to do at the start of summer, not the end. Thing is, I’ve been trying to pull myself together mentally, all summer due to certain events that are far too personal to mention (at least, not yet.)

Right now, I’m working on my room. I feel way too claustrophobic just sitting in it and it’s so difficult to move around sometimes, especially when there’s other people in my room. Yes, unfortunately, I’m not one of the lucky few who get to prance about their room as much as they’d like without having to worry about bumping into something… or someone. No, I do not live in a broom closet. The term “broom closet x 3” best describes it. I think.


The “revamped room” is still a work in progress. For now I think I’ll work on my usage of parentheses (I, however, don’t see anything wrong with it.)

Whether this email is phony or not, I decided to have some kicks and giggles. You know, amuse myself because I certainly do not have a life.

It’s funny because number one, I’m getting this email because I took the SAT. I’ve been getting all sorts of emails from colleges in America. Number two, when I “acknowledge my award”, it says “Congratulations Sylvia!” Number three, the details in the email aren’t the same as those in the website.
So I decided to reply.

Full text:


I am very honored to have received such eligibility. I’ve had a look at your school and what you offer and I must say, I would be very happy to go there. However, I realized that you are a Catholic school.

I’m so sorry to say that I recently converted to Buddhism. Does one necessarily have to be a Catholic to enter your school? I certainly hope not. I suppose it shouldn’t be a problem. After all, you couldn’t even get my name right (it most certainly isn’t Sylvia) on the page in which  I acknowledge my scholarship, which in the email you say is $7,500 per year but in the website it says something along the lines of $14,000. Now, that’s not to bad. Heck, I could by myself a new Mac Book Pro after four years of savings. But then again, my name is not Sylvia and this Sylvia, somewhere out there should know of this $14,000 annual scholarship. This concerns me.

You could have possibly shattered her dreams of going to your university, maybe even college itself, by inadvertently sending this to me.

Anyway back to my previous point. I don’t think it would be a problem either for you to accept a Buddhist because you seemed to have persisted on sending me this email, even after I unsubscribed to this. Now, I am quite frankly flattered. But come to think of it, I’ll pass. Besides. I don’t have the luxury or the money to move all the way to Miami, Florida.


Oh, c’mon. Don’t worry, for those of you taking me so seriously. Loosen up. I saved it as a draft.

During my retreat (which I will talk about in another post eventually) last Thursday, I finally found out whether or not I passed the UPCAT. Unfortunately, there was no room for a Dominique Esguerra. My heart broke and the high hopes I had were crushed.

But oh well, c’est la vie. I guess one of the things I realized during that retreat is that passing or failing a college entrance test doesn’t define you. Yes, I was really hoping to get into my family’s (or at least most of my family’s) alma mater and yes, I really really really did want to play football for the Lady Maroons but hey, I still passed two other universities and so I really can’t complain.

We’re going to make an appeal to see if there’s a chance that I can get in still. However, now that I’m done waiting and checking and celebrating/crying over the results, I’m beginning to think twice about where I’m going to go from here.

I honestly did want to go to Ateneo as well. La Salle, too, but mostly (if not only) because I like the courses they offer and the course I passed.

See, if I make an appeal to UP Diliman and become successful in doing so, I’ll be incredibly happy. Then again, I’ll be incredibly scared as well. I will be honest here. I am not fluent at all in what is supposed to be my mother tongue but isn’t, Tagalog. Everyone warns me that I will struggle because I’m an Inglesera  or however you spell it.

They tell me, not only will I struggle with academics because the professors do in fact teach in Filipino but I would also struggle socializing with my peers because not everyone who studies in UP comes from a background like mine.

I feel this is true to a certain point and I am not sure how I’m going to go about it once I get there.

If I’m not successful in getting into UP, I still have Ateneo as my second choice and it’s not a bad thing at all. Heck, when it comes to Ateneo, I don’t feel as scared as I am about UP. Yeah sure, college is college no matter where you go but I still have a sense of comfort knowing that I already know a few people already in as well as going to Ateneo. Not only that, I won’t suffer so much with my incapability of speaking in Tagalog.

As for La Salle. I just really like the course, okay. International freaking Studies. Howeeeever, I’m not really thinking much about going there. Although it wouldn’t be so bad either.

Ateneo or UP (if I manage to get in even after failing the UPCAT)? La Salle or UP (if I manage to get in even after failing the UPCAT)? Ateneo or La Salle?

I hate this.

I don’t get how I’m not excited for Christmas. I mean, I’d seriously be singing Christmas carols right now. I’d be jolly, joyous and MERRY. But guess what? I’m not. I don’t feel anything.

People tell me, “Oh, psshh that just means your growing up. Welcome to the club!” BS. That is just BS. You know what I say? Blame it on society. I mean, we’ve been such oblivious consumers, faithful to the concept of capitalism (COMMUNISM FOR THE WIN) that our economy is slowly, slowly deteriorating.

Look at it. It’s falling apart. We’re facing another economic downturn. “Oh it’s part of the economic cycle! We’ll pick ourselves back up, it’s okay!” Really? Really? Do you really want to go through another Great Depression? From what I heard, some tough sh– shtuff went down during those times. I mean, do look it up on Google (they have an Image search, how nifty is that?) if you’ve never seen the photographs. People lived in shanties. They lived in Hoovervilles! My word, you must be both a sadist and masochist. S&M. Sadomasochist, that’s what they’d call you. Go join Rihanna while you’re at it.

On top of that, I don’t get why Meralco had to double the costs of running electricity. Out of all the houses in my entire neighborhood, I can only count a few whose owners went all out and bonga with the Christmas lights. Oh wait, that’s right. Blame it on monopoly. That’s another thing that’s screwing our economy over.

On top of that “on top of that”, I don’t get how you’re taking me so seriously (if you are). Chill, bro. I’m not that left wing. Nor am I ignorant. Sheesh. However, if I were, I may have a point somewhere in that possibly offensive and unclear rant.

Really though, the only thing I was serious about was the part where I don’t feel anything about Christmas.

Anyway. Since this is my first post, I thought I’d put out something that would cause people (who don’t read the labels of blog posts or skim read) to freak out, to be offended, to feel the need to spark a debate or to just go “the heck did I just read?”

Merry Christmas!

%d bloggers like this: